英语小品短剧本7人简单

英语话剧剧本：搞笑英语话剧：三笑三国 （7个人表演）开场介绍： Ladies and gentlemen,let me introduct the actor. The first is zhaoyun,he is the most actor his black brother zhangfei ,and there boss liubei .don't forgot the other side Mr cao,and his adviser JiangGan,and the most strong XiaHou last,don't forget who behind the scenes ME----the Director. 第一幕：人物，赵云 夏侯惇 曹操 蒋干旁白：就在刚才不久，一个黑大汉从曹操军中救出刘备之子刘阿斗，现在正向这里杀过来，他就是张飞！！！（赵云出场）Not too long ago,a black general saved the son of LiuBei ,Liu A is coming. His name is Zhangfei. 赵云：no！本人姓赵名云，乃常山子龙也！ no! my family name is zhao my middle name is yun and my given name is zilong ~ （赵云从背后拿出一坨布，代表阿斗） 赵云：看！这就是主公的最后一点骨血！刘阿斗！我从火场之中把他救出，而我自己的脸却早已……唉……化作焦炭！（顾影自怜状）look! this is the last blood of the boss ! liu e dou . i took him out from the fire ,but my face hane already ...ai ~. （夏侯敦挺着枪呈猫腰状杀出） 夏侯敦：小贼，莫跑，要不然我就大开杀戒了（冲到） Children， stop there or i will kill you （赵云左手抱阿斗，右手与之搏斗） 赵云：可恶！居然敢偷袭我！fuck,!! you bitch dare to attack me ?? （二人装腔作势打斗数招） 赵云：看我九阴白骨爪！！stop!! wait!!! one two three... nine dark white bone fingers!! 夏侯敦：唔！（倒地） oh my gad i'm over 赵云：此地不宜久留，还是快去寻主公！（下）yeah~ bitch i will go to look for my boss , goodbye~ （曹操、蒋干二人上） 曹操：没想到我们初次出兵便杀得敌人望风而逃！真可谓出师未捷身先死。长使英雄泪满襟！ I didn't expect that we can beat the enemy with our first reminds me of a poem, "Dead Before the Ship Even Sank. Long the hero Tearful" 蒋干：丞相，您说这话，真不见得怎么吉利。 Prime minister,It does not sound good about what you have said; （曹操险些被地上的夏侯敦绊倒） 曹操：咦？这是谁扔的西瓜皮？（转身，看见倒在地上的夏侯敦）Huh? Who threw the banana rind? 曹操：是夏侯爱卿。难道他又在搞什么行为艺术？？Do not Xiahou Dun?Is he engaged in what is called performance art? （蒋干上前将夏侯敦一顿拍打，二人站起） 曹操：夏侯爱卿为何要在地上装西瓜皮？？Why do you want to install banana rind on the ground? 夏侯敦：有一人脸如黑炭 手抱孩子there is a very black people witha baby in his band 蒋干：是敌人的保姆！还带个孩子！！！it Is enemy's maid with a child in his arm. 曹操：那你呢？What did you do? 夏侯敦：i i i…… i rushed to him and fight with him i'mfightting fightting fightting我 我…… 我冲上去与之打斗 打 打 打 曹操：然后呢？What then? 蒋干：丞相，看来是夏侯将军杀退了敌人！ Prime minister, it is likely that general Xiahou has defeated the enemy 夏侯敦：唔唔！（手势如下：指指门外，右手作“九”的样子，随即作全身发冷状，然后指向自己的衣服，再指向曹操，作爪击状） 曹操：然后呢？ Then what happened? 夏侯敦：no no no I was defeated he used the nine cloud white bone finger ,it's so terrible （曹操、蒋干二人将夏侯敦拉起） 曹操：如此看来，敌人应该还没有走远。咱们乘胜追击！（慷慨状）It seems that the enemy should not go far. Let's run after them. 蒋干：有时候我真的很佩服丞相您这乐观的心理……（赞同状） Sometimes I really admires prime minister very much about your optimistic psychology ...... 夏侯敦：唔！唔唔唔~！（抡起两拳，作欲与敌人搏斗状）（三人下）第二幕:人物：刘备 张飞 诸葛亮 赵云（刘备、张飞、诸葛亮三人上）旁白：这是的刘备一行人正在军营外观看敌情~~~LiuBei and his team are looking something out of his military camp.、（诸葛亮走在前面，张飞、刘备二人紧跟其后） 诸葛亮：（转头）主公啊，按理说是您走先啦！（恭敬状）old liu ah,you should walk in front of us! Is not it?刘备：不啦，军师您身后有好大块荫凉，躲在这里避避暑也不错。No，it's very cool that I stand just behind you，I can avoid summer heat 诸葛亮：（眺望状）主公，如果我所料不错，现在马上就要下雨了！liu ah,come here! I tell you a secret! I think it is about to rain! 刘备：先生神算！人所不及！不知先生如何知道将要下雨？great prediction！No one can compare with you！just wonder how do you know it's going to rain？ 诸葛亮：首先，天气预报说今天有雨；其次，（以手指前方）看天，那边有一块黑云来了！First,the weather report told us it is going to rain today;second,look at the sky,so many dark clouds are coming! （赵云上） 张飞：哇！那就是子龙啊，想不到这一会不见子龙就换了个新桌面啊！Ha! That is person who called long ah, I could not believe that you have changd a new tabletop without a minute! （张飞迎上） 张飞：子龙！ long 赵云：翼德救我！ help!!! brother three. （张飞下） 赵云：主公！云殊死力战，方保得小主人在此！只是这许久不见啼哭，怕是已经……（悲愤状，取出布包，打开并捧着） boss, i have trid my best to protect the little boss. but it have a long time to hear nothing. i am afraid... 赵云：kao！这小没良心的，居然还能睡的着！就跟他爹一样！！ oh ~ can the son of bitch get in like his father 刘备：咳咳！（赵云转身面向刘备） 诸葛亮：子龙，不是我说你，你嘴上就是少个把门儿的，总不能啥实话都往外说啊！？Zilong,not I tell you, although it is true,you should not say it out!（刘备怒视诸葛亮，诸葛亮恍如不知，赵云上前，将阿斗递给刘备，刘备捧着阿斗） 刘备：为了你这倒楣孩子，几乎损我一员大将啊！我还留着你赶什么啊，我摔死你吧！！because of you，I almost lose a brave general！Why do I keep you alive，let me kill you！！（阿斗摔下）（赵云上前，对准阿斗狂踹数脚，诸葛亮上前拉住，赵云始终作势欲踢，诸葛亮用身体压住赵云后，走上前去一脚将阿斗踢飞） 旁白：从今以后，阿斗的智力便出现了明显的发育迟缓……This is why liu a dou is so foolish that lost his country. 赵云：咦？怎么不见关二哥呢？ yi ~~ where is brothe two GuanYu? 刘备：二弟昨天为军师摆下一个八卦阵去，不过在冲出去撞马的时候闪着腰了，现在还在休养呢！：He layout the BaGuaZhen for military adviser yesterday, but when he rushed out , he get his waist twisted, now he stay in bed. 诸葛亮：哎，太糟糕了，看我，多健康，多健壮！告诉他，多喝三鹿奶粉！（自恋状）！Oh,It is so bad! Look at me,so healthy,so strong!tell him to drink more sanlu milk powder! 赵云：就给这孩子喝成这样儿了！！！（走上前，抚摸诸葛亮，做怜惜状） so you drink to be a foolish? 曹操（在台下）：啊~！！！（惨烈地）刘备：难道三弟又重操旧业了？咱们快去看看！Did zhangfei return to one's former career ？Go to see what happen?（三人下）第三幕： 人物 张飞 曹操 夏侯 蒋干 刘备 诸葛亮旁白：时间拨回到三分钟之前，张飞大战长坂坡……Go back to three minutes before the time set aside，zhangfei fight with caocao's army on changbanpo （张飞上，在台上转一圈后，如京剧拿柱般亮相，定格） 曹操和蒋干：嘿嘿嘿嘿！（奸笑中） 夏侯敦：唔唔唔唔……（奸笑中） （三人奸笑上台）代写剧本 张飞：哇！火腿肠你回来拉！！ Wa!You, The hot dog, come back ! 夏侯敦：我靠，又一个黑人，黑人都是很牛x的，我怕了。。。 black man come again ， Blacks are very powerful，i'm afaid 曹操：阁下是何人，何以竟有如此美妙的声音！Excuse me. May I know your name? What a wonderful voice you have! 张飞：我便是那燕（yān）人张翼德！（咬牙）I am Zhang Yide from jingdu! (clenches teeth) 曹操：阉人？？原来只是一个太监……夏侯敦，上去解决他！You are the so called coward,aren't you?xiahou,beat it! （夏侯敦低头猫腰冲出） 夏侯敦：唔！唔~唔！ （二人打在一起）（定格）蒋干：丞相，这一仗咱们必输，一会还有桥断水倒流呢！快叫夏侯将军下来吧。 Prime minister, we must have lose this Campaign , the bridge will also cut off the water soon!Let's call Xiahou general to get down quickly曹操：你怎么知道？How dou you know it? 蒋干：《真三国无双叁》，长坂的任务啊！！ "Really,it is the game's duty of Three countries Unparalleled Three"!! 曹操：干啊，我看你是太沉迷于网络游戏了。这样既浪费时间又上海身体，你还是听为丞相的一句话吧！珍爱生命，远离三俗啊！I think you are too addicted to online games. What a waste of time, and It's harmful,listen to me ,You must take good care of yourself. （张飞与夏侯敦二人继续，张飞一枪击中夏侯敦） 夏侯敦：oh my gad i am over again又被打败了 （蒋干上前将夏侯敦拖回） 曹操：唉，如今这世道变了，太监都这么厉害啦！？Why does that coward become so brave?张飞：曹贼听着！今日汝等必不能生过此桥！ cao ,stops talking! Today you all can't pass this bridge with a live one! 曹操：汝休得猖狂！今日要不是我手下典韦身死，许诸拉稀，于禁肺炎，李典麻疹，文聘肝癌，张辽痔疮，才不会输给你！shut up!If general dianwei was still alive,We would not be defeated! 张飞：你手下终究无人可用！啊，面对此景次请，我真想赋诗一首——Nobody may go to battle for you ,Facing this scenery,i really want to sing a , on ......On ......（音乐起）only you ~~~~~only……you…… （夏侯敦跃起） 夏侯敦：唔唔唔……（以手捂耳，跑下） 曹操：啊！（惨厉的叫声，并以手捂耳） 蒋干：啊！（惨厉的叫声，并以手捂耳） 曹操：这难道就是传说中的门得尔松的c大调《鬼叫》协奏曲！何以如此震撼！（惊惶状）Why is this so shocking!蒋干：（一手指张飞）快看！丞相！桥断了！水也开始倒流啦！！（转过身去，以手捂耳） Look, Prime minister! The bridge broke! The water also starts to flow backwards（音效：山崩地裂之声） 曹操：aaaaaaaaaa（痛苦吐血状）（定格） （诸葛亮、刘备、赵云三人上）诸葛亮：别唱啦！再唱下去就把曹操给唱死啦！Do not sing more,ok?if you go on singing,CaoCao will die because of your song!刘备：三弟快打住！！（以手捂耳）Stop,stop！！（以手捂耳） 张飞：only you ~~~~~only……you……（余音不绝） 刘备：子龙，快把三弟扛回去。Zilong，carry zhangfei back quickly。 赵云：好的！ ok （赵云上前，以手捂住张飞的嘴，扛走，张飞依旧唱个不停） （张飞、赵云二人下）旁白：从此以后有一首歌传唱至今 经久不衰，叫做：only you~~~~ since then, a song becomevery very name is《Only You》.(歌声再次响起，众人谢幕~~)。

英语小品剧本《追星》人物：追星A, 追星B，追星C，明星，车主 旁白 经纪人旁白：A girl is crazy about a star called Handsome+人名. Even when she is asleep, she can dream that ：(打哈欠)，I need to go to bed, I’m so sleepy.(打哈欠)——边走边说 （趴在讲台上睡）（进入梦乡）旁白：In her dream……(上台摆两个凳子，A做一个)A：Oh, it’s a fine day. (假装看天) (然后突然不经意的拿起一本书翻看)明星：(上台)：Oh, it’s a fine day. (然后坐凳子)(A看着看着书，就不经意的往旁边看，然后再看看书，突然感觉不对劲，在意外的往旁边看，看到了自己最喜爱的那个明星，十分激动，不敢相信这是真的)A：Are you … are you that … super star?(激动地说不出话)明星：（随意的回答） Yes, what’s wrong?A: I’m your fan,super fan. Your photos are full of my bedroom, no, they are full of my house, including kitchen, living room, bedrooms, and… and toilet.(激动，后面讲到厕所时，还有点不好意思)(当明星听到厕所时，很惊讶)明星：You are too…enthusiastic [in,θju:zi'?stik]. (有点嫌弃)A: Can you give me your signature?(讲到签名，明星就兴奋了)明星：Ok ,of course!A：（大声喊）Oh ,I will have the Handsome______’s signature(突然，两个人跑过来，B把A给推开了然后两人问明星要签名)B：Please ,please give me signature!!!!!!!C: No, give it to me, to me!!!(两人抢着，A一人孤零零的站在旁边，)A: Why the result is this ?(抱头痛哭，边走边哭，然后走到睡觉的那个地方，恢复原来的样子，还有点啜泣)A： Er? Where is it? Oh,it’s just a dream , but ,it’s a bad ’s too early, I want sleep.(又趴下去)旁白：In her second dream, the scene is at the : Look at the tall buildings, they like the …like the …I don’t have any adjrectives to describe them.(明星上场，走在对面，也在欣赏某些东西)A：Oh ,look at there, that man is like a star ! Oh ,Oh ,Oh ,(一次比一次激动)he is …..he is…..Handsome_______！I want his signature! But there is too much cars, What can I do? What can I do? I don’t care this any more, the signature is more important!(正当他准备过马路时，车主做开车动作来了，将要撞A，A很害怕)车主：Look out!A:Don’t come here, don’t come here!(闭着眼睛) (车主迅速下台)（A突然站起来，睁开眼睛）A：A dream .too? Oh, my god, Why do I always can’t get the signature? No, I must get it, sleep again! Yes ,sleep! But ,why do I stand here? I should lie in the bed. Whether these, I must go to bed and get the signature!(趴着又睡)旁白：In her third dream(明星在签名，A前面有B, C)经纪人：One by one,Don’t be wrought-upA: Yeah,I can get it at last. Before me ,there are only two people.（到B）B:I love you very much. My dreamlover.明星：Thank you(B下，C上)C: Oh，I meet you ,can I hug with you ?明星：Sure.(两人抱了一下)（到A）A: I can get your signature in the end! I’m so excited(明星面目有点难受的样子，手捂着肚子)明星：Sorry, can I go to the toilet for a moment? My stomach is hurt a lot.(难受)A: Yes, make yourselfe at home.(过来一会儿)A: Handsome_______ has gone to toilet for such a long time. Is he ok?经纪人对A说：Sorry, the girl, Handsome_____ perhaps can’tcome here to give you signature, He is too hurt. He went : Ah? Why always me ? (伤心地离开，走到睡着的地方)（突然起身）A :Why always me ? I only want a signature~~ ai~~ What time is it now ? (看了一下钟，表情惊讶) It’s near 8 o’clock .I can’t arrive at the school on time! Oh no ,hurry up hurry up!

Summary:The play describes the transformation of a girl's personality from being hostile to being , a child in Taipei, always took a hostile attitude toward others. One day, she fell into a story, "The Wizard of OZ," and joined the journey to find the Wizard with Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tin man, and Lion. Due to Emily's personality, she did not keep good company with days later, Emily met a witch and followed the witch's direction to put Dorothy in a dangerous situation. Within a battle, Lion died for her. Then Emily finally knew that there is love among people. Since then, Emily became a new person--a lovely, charming girl all her IPlace : Kindergarten TaipeiCharacters : Emily Tina, Amy Amy's mother; Teacher; JulieTe: OK, everybody. Time to go home. A: Hey, mom. My mom is here already. I'm going home. M's M: Come on, Amy. Have you got your money for the bus? A: Yes, just a minute. Here it is... was! Miss Lee, someone's stolen my money. Te: Really? How much? A: One thousand dollars. Te: Oh, my gush. OK, nobody leaves until we find the money did anyone take it? E J T: It wasn't me. Te: Well, we'll search everyone's bag then. Now start looking, everyone. T: What's this? 1000 dollars. Here it is in Emily's bag. Te: Emily, how could you? Stealing someone else's money'. I didn't do it. E: I didn't do it. Te: Well, how did the money get into your bag then? E: I don't know. Te: That's not a very good excuse, is it? You must have taken it. I'm going to have to tell your parents about this. E: No, please. It wasn't me. E: Julie and Tina are supposed to be my friends. I'm never going to trust anybody again as long as I live. Part IIPlace : Emily's houseCharacters : Emily Emily's sister and Emily's momNarrator: Five years later E: You took my money, didn't you? E's S: No, ~ didn't. You're always thinking about money. I didn't take it. You lost it. E: No, I didn't. E's S: Mommy! E's M: Emily, don't hit your sister. E: She stole my money. E's M: I think you should stay in your room for the day and think about how you treat others. E: I hate everybody. They're always cheating me out of my money. E: I'm bored. What's this book? E: What's going on? I'm scared. Mommy! Narrator: Suddenly, there is a big flash and Emily is gone. All that is left is "The Wizard of OZ" lying on the bed, the pages fluttering as the wind dies down. Part IIIPlace : OZCharacters : Emily, Scarecrow, Dorothy Lion, and Tin manNarrator: Emily wakes up to find herself in a beautiful village. The sunshine covers the farm and the sunflowers swing in golden waves. People there are always smiling and everyone can see that They're radiant with happiness. What lovely, peaceful village it is. D: Hi, who are you? E: Emily. Where am I? D: You're in OZ, Emily. Uh, did you get lost? E: No, uh ….... yeah. I don't exactly know what happened. D: So, where're you going? E: I want to go home. D: Where? E: Taipei. Do you know how to get there? D: Well... it sounds very far. S: Why are you here? Why aren't you staying at home? E: I'd rather be home if I could. D: Would you like to come with us and find the Wizard? I'm sure he can help you. S: Oh, you have a wish too? What do you want? A beautiful house? A lovely doll? Or... E: Would you please stop asking those stupid questions? D: Don't be so horrible, Emily. Scarecrow doesn't have a brain, and that's why he joined us. E: (shows contempt) D: So, let's go find our partners. Go! Part IVP/ace : OZCharacters : Emily Scarecrow, Dorothy, Lion, and Tin manT: Dorothy, we don't have enough money to buy our lunch. L: Boo! (Scares Emily) E: Ah! (Emily is scared. Then Lion is frightened by Emily's scream. E: What a brave lion. Ha, ha! L: I know... I'm not a proper lion because I don't have courage. S: Oh, poor lion. T: Dorothy, who is she? D: She's Emily, our friend from... another place. E: So, what do you need? A more fashionable appearance? (Knock) Wow, cool. What's this? This sounds funny. T: Because my body is empty. I don't have a heart. S: Emily, leave him alone. D: Un.......Lion, don't we have enough money to buy any bread? L: No, we sure don't. D: Do you have any money, Emily? We need to buy some food. E: No, I don’t have any money. Now, leave me alone. I hate all you. I just want to go home. S: Emily, don't shout at Dorothy. We're just trying to be friendly and help everybody. T: Yes, Emily. Why are you so different from us? You're nothing like us S: I noticed that, too. It's... those clothes that you wear. That's why you're different. T: No, actually, it's not the clothes I'm talking about. It's the way you behave. You're a very selfish girl and very unkind. People in this world are always kind to each other. L: Even though you're very unfriendly, Emily, we still want you to come with us and find the Wizard. F: No, I don't want to go with you any more. L: Well, the only way you can get back home is to follow us. E: I'd better go with VPlace:OZCharacters: Emily Scarecrow, Dorothy Lion, Tin man, WitchNarrator: After walking for several more hours, they find themselves in the middle of an old forest. It's very dark and scary, and everyone is close together. W: Ah, Emily. I hear that you would like to get back to Taipei. E: Yeah, how do you know? W: I keep an eye on things that happen in OZ. I know that they don't like you, Emily. I like you, and I'll help you get back to Taipei. E: Wow, but, how? W: Well, I know that Dorothy likes to eat apples. So, I want you to give her this special apple, OK? It's her favorite kind. E: OK, as long as you help me get back home. W: Yes, of course. Just make sure you give it to her. Make more sure that she eats it. E: OK. E: Dorothy, Dorothy... D: Has she gone? E: Mm, I want to say sorry, Dorothy. I got you this apple. D: For me? Thank you. My favorite. D: Delicious... I feel sleepy. I want to lie down. W: Well done, Emily. Now I've got Dorothy at last. E: Can I go back to Taipei now? W: Don't be so stupid, Emily. Do you really think I was going to help you? You should never trust VIPlace: OZCharacters: Emily Scarecrow, Dorothy Lion, and Tin manS T L: Dorothy, Dorothy. Where are you? T: We have to find Dorothy. S: Hey. (See Emily) L: Emily, did you see Dorothy? S T L: We can't find her. E: You all treated me so bad. So, I want to teach you all a lesson. I took her to the witch. It's just an eye for an eye. L: Oh, my gush. S: How could you do that? T: She is such a nice girl. E: That's how you treated me. S: Emily, you have a brain, but you don't know how to think or how to tell right from wrong. T: You have a heart. But you don't know how to be considerate. It must be empty. L: You can help us to find Dorothy, and turn over a new leaf. If some day your friend betrays you, how will you feel? S: Dorothy is such a nice girl. But how could you... E: When I was younger, even my best friend betrayed me. So, why should I believe anyone? T: We're sorry to hear that, but we don't mean you any harm. We want to help you get home. Why don't you try and trust people a bit more? E: I don't want to listen to you. Go away. L: We have to try and rescue Dorothy. You can stay here if you like. E: Hey...PartVIIPlace: OZCharacters: Emily Scarecrow, Dorothy Lion,Tin man, WitchW: You have no choice but to die. D: No... W: (Emily stabs Witch) You... you... you... Emily...(Everybody cheers.) D: Emily, you did a very good job.(When nobody notices the witch, she secretly crawls to Emily and intends to stab her.) L: Hey...(Lion runs to Emily and takes the attach for her.) F: Ah! ! Oh, Lion, why did you do this for me? I never treated you well L: That's OK. We're friends for... e... VIIIPlace : OZCharacters : Emily Scarecrow, Dorothy, Lion, Tin man, Wizard, Guard manD: Excuse me. We want to see the Wizard. G: I'm sorry. You can't. Everybody: Please. D: We're in trouble. We want the Wizard to help us. G: OK, this way please. Follow me. D: Hello, Wizard. We're Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tin man, and Emily. W: The Wizard is sick. I'm his sister. I know who you all are. I've been watching you all along the path of Yellow Brick Road. And now you've found me. I'd like to reward you all. To you, Mr. Scarecrow, I'll give you brain. S: A brain? E: One and one is... S: Two. E: Two plus two is... S: Four. I got a brain. I become smarter. W: To you, Mr. Tin man. I'll give you a heart. T: A heart. A really heart. Scarecrow, listen, a real heart. W: Dorothy, I'll send you back to Kansas. D: Thank you. W: And finally, Emily, you must learn to trust people more in the future and be kind to people. There are some nice people in the world. E: Yes, Wizard. I realized that there are kind people in the world because the lion has shown me that. I'm sorry that he died. He was such a nice lion. I only realized this after he died for me. I wish I could bring him back. W: Well, Emily, Fm touched by your change of heart. I believe that everyone is good deep down. So, I'll make your wish come true. I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll grant the lion a new life and give him courage also. L: (Roars) I'm back. I’m back. W: Emily, I hope you've learned your lesson. E: Yes, Wizard. I promise I won't be a bad girl any more. I know that I really Can trust people. W: OK, come here. Close your eyes. Back to Taipei you go. Good-bye, Emily. E: Good-bye everyone, Dorothy, Scarecrow, Lion, Tin man. I'm sorry. It was nice meeting you all... Narrator: Form then on, Emily is no longer a naughty child. She realizes the most precious treasure is the trust between friends and cherish all the friendship around her, and then becomes a lovely, pleasing, charming girl all her End